It’s Important to Separate Feelings and Facts
I often see clients that are confused and have difficulties making sense of their life situation. It is very important to learn to separate feelings from facts. While you may be confused about how you feel and why you feel this way, facts are undeniable.
As human beings, we experience a wide range of emotions every day. We feel happy, sad, angry, anxious, and everything in between. These emotions can cloud our judgment and make it difficult to see things clearly. This is why it's important to separate feelings from facts.
When we are faced with a difficult situation, it's easy to get caught up in our emotions. We may feel hurt, betrayed, or angry, and these feelings can make it hard to think rationally. However, it's important to remember that feelings are not the same as facts. Just because we feel a certain way, it doesn't mean that our feelings are based on reality.
For example, let's say that you feel that your partner has lied to you. This feeling may be based on something that you saw or heard, or it may be based on your own insecurities. However, it's important to separate the feeling from the fact. Did your partner actually lie to you? If so, this changes the situation entirely. But if there is no evidence of a lie, then it's possible that your feelings are based on something else entirely.
The same is true for other situations. If you feel that you are not valued at work, is this feeling based on actual evidence or on your own insecurities? If you feel that you were used or manipulated in a relationship, is this feeling based on fact or on your own interpretation of the situation?
One way to separate feelings from facts is to write down your situation and then remove the feeling parts. For example, if you are feeling that your partner has cheated on you, write down the facts of the situation without including your emotions. This can help you see the situation more clearly and make it easier to make the right choice.
It's important to remember that feelings are valid and important. It's okay to feel angry, hurt, or sad. However, it's also important to recognize when our feelings are not based on facts. When we can separate our feelings from reality, we are better able to make rational decisions and move forward in a positive way.
In conclusion, separating feelings from facts is an important skill to learn. It can help us see situations more clearly and make better decisions. So the next time you are faced with a difficult situation, take a step back and try to separate your emotions from the facts. You may be surprised at how much easier it is to make the right choice when you are looking at things objectively.
Exersice:
If you are confused about your situation, describe it in writing and then remove the “feeling” parts. The picture will become very clear and it will be easier to make the right choice.
Examples:
I feel that he/she lied to me. – Is it a feeling or did he/she really lied? If that’s a fact, that would change everything.
I feel that I am not valued here. – Is it a feeling or you are really not valued? If that’s a fact, that would change everything.
I feel that he/she cheated on me. – Is it a feeling or it really happened? If that’s a fact, that would change everything.
I feel that I was used/manipulated/abused. – Is it a feeling or you really were used/manipulated/abused? If that’s a fact, that would change everything.